It has been so long since I last blogged. I guess that is because there is really nothing much to blog about with regards to Vietnam. We are still waiting.
The good news is that the first 3 families who received their referrals back in September are traveling to Vietnam in 2 weeks to bring their babies home. Our agency is now hoping that the paperwork for the next 3 referrals will be coming shortly.
When we last checked, we were 41 on the list. 3 down, 38 to go!
January 1, 2008
July 13, 2007
Bittersweet Summers
Summers have been exciting times for me. I get a much need break from my students and school. I get to spend my time doing things around the house. I can stay on top of my housework (a girl can dream, right!). Paul and I usually go away for a vacation. However, the last 3 summers have been tough.
2 years ago, when we started trying for a baby, we thought I'd be pregnant or had just given birth in the summer. That didn't happen. Last year we were going through rounds of IVF, and we thought I'd be pregnant of had just given birth in the summer. That didn't happen. This summer we thought we would be very close to a referral or even have our referral and waiting for a travel date toVietnam
So, another summer has come and no baby. No referral. Not even a hint that a referral is coming in the near future. This summer has been the hardest though because we have a room upstairs that has a closet with a few baby clothes, nursery bedding, and books. We have a crib, change table, and dresser (still in boxes though because I wouldn't be able to handle it if they were already set up). I have to keep the door shut to that room. I don't venture in there very often, but when I do, I am overcome by sadness and my mind is racing with questions that I don't have answers to.
Somewhere, buried deep inside me, I know that Paul and I will become parents one day (said with a little prayer to the big man upstairs). But right now, all I see is the two of us standing on a road that turns, twists, and stretches farther than our eyes can see. We know that we have already traveled a long way down that road. We've had times where we were leaping down it and times where we were just taking baby steps. Right now and for the last few months, it feels as though the road is covered with mud up to our waist and we are trying to run to the end but can't. We are trapped. Our legs and bodies are aching because we are trying so hard. We know where we want to go, we know what is waiting at the end for us, but we just can't get there.
After everything we've been through in the part 3 years, isn't it time we get a break! Just a tiny ray of hope that actually shines rather than fade out. I don't know how much more of this I can take, emotionally. I would have thought that by now, my tear ducts would be dried up from over-use, my life time supply of worries would have been used up a long time ago, and my patience completely shot by now. I know everything happens for a reason but come on, how long does one have to wonder what that reason is!
Ah, I needed to vent and get that out of my system.
Until the next vent …
2 years ago, when we started trying for a baby, we thought I'd be pregnant or had just given birth in the summer. That didn't happen. Last year we were going through rounds of IVF, and we thought I'd be pregnant of had just given birth in the summer. That didn't happen. This summer we thought we would be very close to a referral or even have our referral and waiting for a travel date to
So, another summer has come and no baby. No referral. Not even a hint that a referral is coming in the near future. This summer has been the hardest though because we have a room upstairs that has a closet with a few baby clothes, nursery bedding, and books. We have a crib, change table, and dresser (still in boxes though because I wouldn't be able to handle it if they were already set up). I have to keep the door shut to that room. I don't venture in there very often, but when I do, I am overcome by sadness and my mind is racing with questions that I don't have answers to.
Somewhere, buried deep inside me, I know that Paul and I will become parents one day (said with a little prayer to the big man upstairs). But right now, all I see is the two of us standing on a road that turns, twists, and stretches farther than our eyes can see. We know that we have already traveled a long way down that road. We've had times where we were leaping down it and times where we were just taking baby steps. Right now and for the last few months, it feels as though the road is covered with mud up to our waist and we are trying to run to the end but can't. We are trapped. Our legs and bodies are aching because we are trying so hard. We know where we want to go, we know what is waiting at the end for us, but we just can't get there.
After everything we've been through in the part 3 years, isn't it time we get a break! Just a tiny ray of hope that actually shines rather than fade out. I don't know how much more of this I can take, emotionally. I would have thought that by now, my tear ducts would be dried up from over-use, my life time supply of worries would have been used up a long time ago, and my patience completely shot by now. I know everything happens for a reason but come on, how long does one have to wonder what that reason is!
Ah, I needed to vent and get that out of my system.
Until the next vent …
July 2, 2007
Backyard Project Complete!
I haven't updated in a while but we've been busy with our backyard project. I'm happy to say that it is completed! Now we can sit back and enjoy it!
Moving the dirt and building the beds
It's ready for plants!
Here come the plants!
Ahhhh - it's done!
All we need next is the sod!
Moving the dirt and building the beds
It's ready for plants!
Here come the plants!
Ahhhh - it's done!
All we need next is the sod!
June 13, 2007
HOLY DIRT, BATMAN!
This is what I saw as I drove into the driveway tonight after work!
Huston, we have ourselves a project!
Can you guess what we'll be doing this weekend!?
Huston, we have ourselves a project!
Can you guess what we'll be doing this weekend!?
June 9, 2007
If We Keep Ourselves Busy ....
will it take our minds off of all the unknowns in the adoption world? Will it help pass the time quicker? Will it help us (ok, me) be worry 24/7 about our future? I don't know if it will work, but it's worth a try!
With no news to report on the adoption front (insert big sigh here), we have jumped into another project. We are landscaping our front and backyard this summer. P has started digging out the future gardens in the backyard today. There's going to be a lot of gardens but we saved just enough room for a future swing set!
Here's a few pictures from today.... this one is P just getting started!
Sophie, "Daddy, what are doing to my grass?".
"Now Sophie, you must not trample on mommy's flowers when she gets them planted. You must be a good girl and stay out of the gardens....okay?"
"Okay daddy, I'll try, but look at all that delicious dirt! Are you sure I can't help mommy with the diggin' ! I'm a good digger!"
Sight of future swing set
Stay tuned for more pictures to come and "Conversations with Sophie" as progress continues!!!
With no news to report on the adoption front (insert big sigh here), we have jumped into another project. We are landscaping our front and backyard this summer. P has started digging out the future gardens in the backyard today. There's going to be a lot of gardens but we saved just enough room for a future swing set!
Here's a few pictures from today.... this one is P just getting started!
Sophie, "Daddy, what are doing to my grass?".
"Now Sophie, you must not trample on mommy's flowers when she gets them planted. You must be a good girl and stay out of the gardens....okay?"
"Okay daddy, I'll try, but look at all that delicious dirt! Are you sure I can't help mommy with the diggin' ! I'm a good digger!"
Sight of future swing set
Stay tuned for more pictures to come and "Conversations with Sophie" as progress continues!!!
May 22, 2007
Our Weekend Project: Operation Closet Reno
I designed and ordered a closet unit for the baby's room. Our project over the long weekend was to install it... here are a few pictures!
The Closet After
We are so pleased with the results! Now we just have to start filling it!
The Closet Before
The Closet in Boxes
The Prep-Work
In Progress
The Closet After
May 20, 2007
A Disappointing Week
The process of adoption is like a roller coaster ride with the ups and downs. Last week was one of those downs. We waited all month for an update from our agency and the news was discouraging. No referrals yet. Our agency re-opened adoptions through Vietnam 6 months ago and still no referrals. One of the people we spoke to at the agency told us they don't know when to start expecting referrals. Our director is over in Vietnam now trying to get our files through faster and making the necessary connections with all the right people.
When we first started this process we were told to expect a 6-9 month wait for a referral. Once we had our dossier complete and ready to send to VN, they told us the wait would be 9-18 month. Now, after talking with our agency last week, they told us it will probably be more like a minimum of 18 months. Apparently there are 25 people ahead of us who are referral ready and 16 ahead of us waiting for IAO approval. After hearing that, there were a lot of "what ifs" going through my mind. It just seems like nothing is easy is in this process. I've been so excited about this adoption since we decided to switch to Vietnam from China - it seemed like the right thing to do after all the disappointments we had with the China route. Now this past week, it felt like the wind was taken from our sails, yet again.
I knew going into this the road wouldn't be a smooth one. I knew that there would be ups and downs. I am prepared to wait the 18+ months it may take to get our baby but I do hope that aren't too many more disappointments, I don't know how much more I can take.
When we first started this process we were told to expect a 6-9 month wait for a referral. Once we had our dossier complete and ready to send to VN, they told us the wait would be 9-18 month. Now, after talking with our agency last week, they told us it will probably be more like a minimum of 18 months. Apparently there are 25 people ahead of us who are referral ready and 16 ahead of us waiting for IAO approval. After hearing that, there were a lot of "what ifs" going through my mind. It just seems like nothing is easy is in this process. I've been so excited about this adoption since we decided to switch to Vietnam from China - it seemed like the right thing to do after all the disappointments we had with the China route. Now this past week, it felt like the wind was taken from our sails, yet again.
I knew going into this the road wouldn't be a smooth one. I knew that there would be ups and downs. I am prepared to wait the 18+ months it may take to get our baby but I do hope that aren't too many more disappointments, I don't know how much more I can take.
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